Memories with my Loved Ones

Goodbye Donnie. Glad you have found some peace after a wonderful life.

At times I’ve thought that life was unfair. I feel like I’ve lost my loved ones a lot earlier than what could be considered normal. My dad before my wedding and children. A grandparent in my teens. Two others before my birth. And another a few days before his daughter’s (my mom) visit, and the announcement of his second great-grandchild. Maybe I’ve been unlucky, but it’s always eaten away at me a little bit. After thinking these memories through, I know I’ve been lucky. Cherish your loved ones.

#9. Naked Gun 33 1/3. This is the first time I remember going to the movies with my grandparents and just myself. Usually my brother or cousin went with, and that’s if we ever did so. I got to pick the movie, and without really knowing, I picked this “classic”. The car ride home was sensational. It was my grandmother complaining about how crappy movies have become, and how there’s nothing funny about that day’s humor. I thought the movie was hilarious.

#8. Birthday Checks. I’m now closer to 40 than I am to 30 (ahhhh!!!!), and I still received a birthday check from my grandmother (Donnie) at least up until this year. But that’s only because she forgot. And only forgotten because she found out that she had cancerous cells. If I can push 90, I’d like to think that I will certainly do the same for my grandchildren. And that they will use the money to purchase my favorite liquor the same way I liked to do for them. (The Goose).

#7. Spaghetti with my Dad and his Mom (Nan). I just remember the smells now, but I used to remember the shadows of my dad and my Nan as they would make spaghetti together in the kitchen while my brother and I played. My dad had a tough time in a lot of his relationships, but their love for one another was a blessing to me, and taught me something about my own relationship with my mom. While I have no business being in the kitchen, I think I can draw a lot of parallels from the happiness that each of us had spending time with our mothers.

#6. Texas Trip to say goodbye. Some things are better left unfinished. But I’m so glad I got to go to Texas and say goodbye to my grandma. She wasn’t the same; it was tough to be there at times. For someone who was usually so vibrant and commanded attention, she didn’t really say much at all for our stay. But I had my mother, brother, aunt and cousin all there with us, and it was nice to be able to do that as a family. It won’t change the way I see her in my eyes.

#5. Grocery Shopping with Nan. Ha, I use the same tactics. While most of the time growing up I was reserved or accommodating to all situations, when my brother and I were together as kids, it was modern warfare. We just never got along, and would always get into verbal and sometimes even physical altercations. (It’s so much better now, just the verbal). So when she would take us shopping, like clockwork she would tell us that we could each get a toy as long as we behaved. Every single time. I can’t imagine the bins of toys that she must’ve had accumulated during our trips to Pennsylvania. But it worked.

#4. Neil O’Donnell with Dad. He might not be the worst QB of all-time but it’s close. Or so we thought. A majority of our conversations over the phone during my teenage years were about football, and while he loved the Steelers and I loved the Packers, we both were able to agree on one thing. Neil O’Donnell sucked. We used to joke that the Steelers would have been as dominant as the Cowboys if we could just talk Jerry Jones into trading Neil O’Donnell to the Cowboys for Troy Aikman. And the funny thing is, he wasn’t that bad. He just cost them one Super Bowl once he got there.

#3. The Vikings/Packers game with Poppa. (Donnie’s husband). I never really got the chance to know my grandfather on a personal level, because during family events the kids were all together and the grown-ups were all together, and I just felt like he didn’t share my passion for sports. What I didn’t know is how much fun he was. This was either in 2003 or 2004 and the first game of the season was the Packers/Vikings game. I had invited my friend Harland (Geez, half this group is gone, I still miss you bro) and while the game was a disaster (for me – Packers were down 21-0 at one point), we had so much fun there. I had my first Grey Goose Martini with my grandpop, and we all just shot the crap (my Uncle Nate hosted), and watched football. Wish we could’ve had more fun like this..

#2. September 11^th phone call with my dad. Last time I talked to him. I know that the planes brought despair and sadness to a lot of people, but I was able to talk to my dad one last time. It went something like this.

“Hey, heard that a plane went down in rural Pennsylvania. Thought it might have hit you.”

“Nope, just missed.”

“Darn. Well you would have been famous anyway.”

“Time for me to go back into the army and kick some ass.”

“That’s another way to become famous.” …

Still miss him.

#1. Jeopardy and Vodka/waters with Donnie this year. While it isn’t DNA or environment related, my grandmother and I share a lot in common. Vodka, sports, black history, our dislike for stupidity, and no talking during Jeopardy. A bonding moment I’ll never forget. I love you.