And finally, my little firecracker Lucas Torrence. His was tough, but for different reasons than Logan, while he doesn’t have so many layers, it was tough ranking them from highest to lowest. Love my ALL!
#8 – Innovative. I wish I had his gift for the innovative. The way he attacks games and puzzles and all things challenging is as impressive as anything I’ve seen my children do, and his flair for the original is remarkable as well. Two examples. First, I have taught him how to use the remote to the point where a 2 year old is capable of finding shows, channels and the like. Last week, he understood that when I get to commercials on DVR, I fast forward through them and get back to the program. He asked me which button it is that is supposed to be pushed, but I knew that the actual FF button would be too advanced for his little mind. So I taught him that he could push the 30 seconds forward button and he would get there faster. Yesterday he asked me how many times it must be pushed in order to get through all commercials (I said 4, which equates to about 2 minutes). And at 29 months, Lucas is now self-sufficient getting through commercials on the DVR. Second example: we play soccer in the downstairs hallway. I don’t want to blast the ball, for fear of knocking down pictures and broken glass situations and so I tend to always side foot pass the ball back to Lucas. Without instruction or coaxing, Lucas started side footing the ball right back to me. Needless to say, I understand my blessings.
#7 – Precise. This kind of goes hand-in-hand with his gift for the innovative, but precision is the name of Lucas’s game. Part of it has to do with his parenting, because I spend time making little mistakes for the kids to correct in order to build up their confidence. We have a puzzle made of the alphabet and just to throw them off I’ll put the M in place of the W and vice versa. Or the B with the D, etc. Lucas will actually get irritated with me when I do that. His puzzles have to be done correctly and in a certain order. He will ask me when I shampoo his hair if I’m “done?” This means is there any shampoo left after he’s dumped 10 buckets of water on his head. If I say no, he will dump another 10 and ask me again.
#6 – Intuitive. He understands people and situations very well for someone that’s so young. Most of you are probably familiar with the yodeling man on The Price Is Right. Lucas understood that after seeing the man fall once, that it wasn’t supposed to happen and he blurted out “Oh no!” Now he knows that the man needs to stop before the edge in order for the contestant to win their prize. But I think the most impressive thing he’s grasped at his age is that when he gets up from his nap before Logan does, he’ll whisper “Daddy? Daddy?” to see if I can get him out before Logan wakes up. Even after I get him out of his room, he still whispers knowing that Logan is asleep. There’s no doubt that he’s my most challenging child, but there are some things that I wouldn’t trade the disturbances for.
#5 – Clever. But not in a good way. One of the reasons that Lucas is so challenging is because of his crafty way of understanding situations. Even at 2 years, he never had any interest in sitting in his high-chair. Logan could have spent the rest of his life in one. Lucas doesn’t like to sit still for long, and so he started seating himself at one of our chairs so he could have that freedom. Problem is, he gets up every 30 seconds to play or tell us something or to distract the boys. He also knows that we keep snacks in high places. He has already learned how to push the stool over to the counter top, climb up and looks for these snacks. Then, when I caught him in the act, he said “cup.” Yeah, dad just gave you a glass of milk buddy. I can’t wait to see how else he hides his future shenanigans from me.
#4 – Forceful. Lucas is very small. But even more than Aiden and Logan, he is a handful. While Aiden likes to challenge and create conflict, and Logan tries to prevent conflict, it seems that Lucas almost tries to promote it. The minute we sit down at the dinner table, instead of eating, Lucas starts to spit. At Sara, Aiden, Logan. I’m quick to reaction, and he knows better. But he still loves to just... push everyone’s buttons. It’s like he wants to see how far he can go with everyone. Even more interesting is that Lucas rarely smiles. It seems like an effort to him, and something has to be done to deserve such effort. But when we get into our ‘no’ arguments, you can just see the cracks on the edge of his mouth turn upward. “Lucas, go find your tiger.” “No.” “Lucas, finish your dinner.” “No.” “Lucas, stop pushing Logan.” “No.” Smile.
#3 – Observant. This really should be his #1, because I think he sees the world through the eyes of a 14-15 year old, as opposed to someone at his age. Most kids say hi when you tell them to say hi to somebody. Lucas will give the look like, “and why does this person deserve my hello... Let’s wait and see what they are like...” and he will. It’s how I know why my two best childhood friends are good people because he opened up to them rather quickly compared to anyone else. When we watch sports or game shows, he really watches them. He gets excited any time a daily double comes up on Jeopardy, and I believe that he really knows that it’s a crucial moment in the game. Watching him at Aiden’s soccer games was really something else too. He already grasps what’s going on in the game. He’ll make a great athlete, not because of any talent that I or Sara have given him, and not because he’s the type to be a workout-aholic. He will because he’ll have it down years before the other kids do. I’ll even say it’s not a guess.
#2 – Shy. I hate using that word, because I don’t think it encompasses Lucas, but none of the other ones gave me what I wanted (mistrusting, skeptical, introverted, passive). I just don’t think he opens up because his brothers do - Like he’s shy, because the other 4 Confers are so out-going. So somebody has to do it. I don’t think outside of his CoT he’s ever started a conversation. Logan will go up to someone at Sam’s Club and say hi. Aiden has no problem talking to anyone once he gets acclimated (pre-school, friends-kids, etc) Lucas will hoot and holler if he knows the mailman is outside dropping off the mail, but if we are coming back from the park and the mailman says hello as he drives past? You bet your ass Lucas doesn’t say a word. Maybe it is shy. Or maybe it’s a word that he’ll create when his innovative self comes to culmination.
#1- Leaderful. I didn’t know how this word was defined when I went through the personality traits list. To be honest, I didn’t even know it was a word, just thought it was something that W Bush may have came up with during his run in office. In any case, it’s defined as: The property of leading all together (collectively) and at the same time (concurrently). Yes! This isn’t Lucas now, but I can see that it’s going to be him in years time. While both of my other boys have some forms of leadership traits, and they both should be capable of running things from time to time, I think Lucas was just born with it. If you go back and look at some of his gifts: intuitive, observant, precise (detailed), clever. It reads pretty well for most leaders’ traits, at least on the intellectual side. I don’t see Lucas as the rah-rah type at all. He’s standoffish enough to know that he won’t ever be his subordinates’ closest friends. But I think he has a gift for the collective-concurrent conundrum. These leaders understand that in order to be a great leader, you have to have everyone chasing the exact same thing and at the exact same time. No leaving your desk at 3 while everyone else stays until 5. No chasing your 10th assist for a triple-double, when you have a wide open shot to win. I think Lucas will grasp it better than I do, and he could go on to do some very special things.
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